Sunday, April 12, 2009

Rainy Days and Sundays ...

... And, let's be honest, probably Monday too. It's Seattle area folks. What did you expect?

I am really not patient. I mean, that's not news, but it's worth stating again. The real problem here is that some doctor I've never seen again told me six weeks ago that I would be induced at week 37ish ... and that was a week and a half ago ... so now I feel like I'm WAY past where I'm supposed to be. Which I'm not. But still.

I have to ask myself, though, what kind of a person I am if I am really this impatient about having a baby. Back in the day, and by "day" I mean, oh, around 10 months ago, when i was praying about whether or not now was a good time to have a kid, I told God I want to be a "living sacrifice." That's right -- straight out of Romans for ya.

Do living sacrifices spend this much time complaining? I mean, being a sacrifice isn't easy .. but you'd think they complain only if it was forced upon them. This bit I'm in is one that I "presented myself" for, if you will. Am I allowed to think it sucks? Am I allowed to ask God to make it stop ASAP?

I pray a lot about the whole having a baby thing.... and by pray a lot I mean ask God to make it end. Now. This morning the verse in Psalm 13 jumped into my head: "How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?"

That may seem kind of comical and dramatic, but the truth is that is exactly how I feel ... that this will NEVER end and that God has basically forgotten to make the human come out. I feel completely alone in this ... sigh.

So, dramatic though it is ...

How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?

Ok, God. When??

1 comment:

  1. The good news is that I'm pretty sure all babies come sooner or later, and I seriously doubt you'll be the exception. The bad news... well, you already know that part. ;-)