... And, let's be honest, probably Monday too. It's Seattle area folks. What did you expect?
I am really not patient. I mean, that's not news, but it's worth stating again. The real problem here is that some doctor I've never seen again told me six weeks ago that I would be induced at week 37ish ... and that was a week and a half ago ... so now I feel like I'm WAY past where I'm supposed to be. Which I'm not. But still.
I have to ask myself, though, what kind of a person I am if I am really this impatient about having a baby. Back in the day, and by "day" I mean, oh, around 10 months ago, when i was praying about whether or not now was a good time to have a kid, I told God I want to be a "living sacrifice." That's right -- straight out of Romans for ya.
Do living sacrifices spend this much time complaining? I mean, being a sacrifice isn't easy .. but you'd think they complain only if it was forced upon them. This bit I'm in is one that I "presented myself" for, if you will. Am I allowed to think it sucks? Am I allowed to ask God to make it stop ASAP?
I pray a lot about the whole having a baby thing.... and by pray a lot I mean ask God to make it end. Now. This morning the verse in Psalm 13 jumped into my head: "How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?"
That may seem kind of comical and dramatic, but the truth is that is exactly how I feel ... that this will NEVER end and that God has basically forgotten to make the human come out. I feel completely alone in this ... sigh.
So, dramatic though it is ...
How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?
Ok, God. When??
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2 days ago