Whole30: All About the Experiments

The tagline of Bumble Thrift makes it clear: we're all about experimental living here.

Which makes it not at all surprising that we like making crazy, impulsive life changes. There was that time I decided to start cloth diapering. There was the time I wanted to make things a habit. And now there's this:

We're going to start Whole30.

Created as a month-long diet reset challenge by the people of Whole9, the Whole30 diet is designed to help you quit all processed food cold turkey. No dairy. No grains. No beans. No added sugar. No food with ingredients you can't pronounce or think "what the mother of crap is that" when you see it on the label.

Just real food. Meat. Eggs. Veggies. Fruit. Nuts. Seeds.

No hydrogenated blah blah blah. No oil smooshed out of a bean. No sugar, artificial or otherwise. No grains. No dairy.

You get the idea.

When Luke's chest pain was found to be caused by a 90 percent blockage in his LAD and he was forced to get several stints in lieu of deploying, he somewhat changed his diet. Bacon is rarely seen in our home. Egg beaters appeared in our refridgerator.

When David's skin problem was diagnosed as psoriasis large tubs of steroid creams made their home in his bathroom. We got the hair on his scalp to grow back.

When I had trouble getting rid of the baby weight after Huck was born -- even though I exercise like a fool and ran throughout my pregnancy -- I resorted to a low carb diet that leaves me hungry all the time and inevitably includes binge eating at dinner. But I lost weight.

Problems solved, right?

But the more I thought about these events and their "fixes," the more dissatisfied I became. Surely we can keep my 29-year-old, extremely fit husband healthy without resorting to fake eggs? There must be a way to help David's skin without resorting to steroid creams until at least puberty, when it may clear up on its own. There must be a way to be healthy without feel hangry 24/7. (hungry + angry = hangry).

Solution: the Whole30.

It sounds radical. I know it's going to be very challenging. People going through it for the first times report "flu like symptoms" as their body comes off of processed carbs. And, frankly, I might die from lack of Diet Coke.

But we're going to give it a try. For 30 days we're going to play by the book, doing our best to become healthy.

Here's what I hope happens over the next 30 days:

• Luke's health increases and he's comfortable with eating natural foods without worrying about "heart healthy" labels.
• David's skin clears-up without the use of "creams."
• I drop some poundage, particularly in the stomach area.
• I no longer feel like death when I contemplate leaving my comfort beverage, Diet Coke.
• I become comfortable with idea of cooking real food and taking time to eat it.

My first Whole30 grocery day is today. Here are my fears:

• Huck has a meltdown when it takes me FOREVER to shop due to label reading.
• I'm going to drop dead from the price of "natural" stuff.
• The commissary flat-out doesn't carry what I need.

Stay tuned!