I have three major fears:
-- Rubber Chickens
(OK, that last one was a joke).
But seriously, spiders is number one. I am terrified. Absolutely petrified. As in, heart stop, panic, shaking.
And so you can imagine my reaction this morning when, after going in and out of the bathroom for multiple hours from the time I got up I noticed The World's Largest Spider on the wall above the shower.
I almost died.
(OK, maybe Im exaggerating a little).
What DID die was the spider.
I'm a little (ok, um, a lot) passive aggressive when it comes to dealing with fears, spiders included.
And so the Giant Spider from Hades received death by sprayed bleach and was quickly washed down the bath tub drain.
I'm convinced myself that there is not so much a nest of Giant Spiders from Hades in my new apartment as a boy who forgets to close the back door at night and therefore, screen door with a crack not withstanding, lets giant bugs in my house.
(This, of course, is the same boy who doesnt hang up the bathmat and loves pork. I'll give you one guess).
(It's also very convenient for me to blame said boy for the giant spider, even though it's likely not his fault at all. It makes me feel better. Remember: there is a land called Passive Agressiva, and I am its Queen).
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